Men and women, let's work together

Carolyn Custis James, a theologian who has championed scholarship on the word ezer, has some winsome things to say about The Blessed Alliance between men and women. Click here.

Lesson 5: Transparency and Restoration in Community

This week's lie:

“If I admit I’ve done something wrong, people will think I’m not a Christian.” That’s the lie. Don’t believe it!

Here is the truth:

“We need fellowship and accountability in Christian community to stay right with God.”

Have you ever felt like your slip was showing, in a figurative sense? That is, people all around you are aware of something about you that you're not aware of? Sort of like the woman who exits the ladies' room with a piece of toilet paper stuck to her heel, trailing behind her?

In my house, PMS stands for "Petty Menstrual Syndrome." I can get incredibly stressed out right before that time of the month, but I always attribute my angst and short fuse to "too much to do," "too many people who need help," or "the blues." This last month the husband called my bluff. He told me all would be well in about two days. And he was exactly right! On my own, I never realized how much the "monthly curse" affects me emotionally. I needed someone else to help clarify the truth, to give me a new perspective. To help me to know that all would be well.

We all need that! In fact, it might surprise you to know that the Bible was written to be received in community, not just for the individual. God so often speaks to us as His collective body, but we're so tuned in to our individualistic American culture that we're tuned out to the beauty of what He wants to accomplish in us as His church, His bride.

Don't miss this week's lesson--my prayer is that you will walk away extremely relieved that you can a) get real about where you're at and be transparent with other believers and b) walking through life with "folks" or "community" can help protect you and help all of us to experience God's love in ways we never dreamed possible. See you Thursday!

James 5:13-16

“Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”

Complimentary, my dear sisters

This week we discovered the power of loving those other female image-bearers of God, the other ezers walking around, mingling with us, working and worshipping with us.

I've felt a little blue this week at times, mostly because it is February (blech) and because I have a whole lot of work to accomplish in the next few weeks and not a lot of breathing space. But I'm telling you, this sharing positive compliments thing works--not just when you receive a compliment, but when you give one.

It happened to me Friday morning when I got on my exercise bike at the YMCA and met a young woman named Christina. One thing led to another, and instead of reading the Family Circle in my hands, I enjoyed a conversation with my new friend. Finally, after sharing some life details--and faith details--I told her about our grand experiment and how we are supposed to go around literally complimenting people. She was a bit taken back when I told her I wanted to compliment her on her resolve to try to get in shape, and that this was her 4th workout in the last few weeks. I even got a chance to encourage her about God's love for her. I talked a bit about forgiveness. And all that was just intertwined with talk about kids and husbands, jobs and health, working out and losing weight.

No big deal. Except it was a big deal to me, because I'm usually quite lonely when I'm at the Y. It feels like I'm the odd woman out, with no friends to speak of, and it gets old. Go figure that it was our grand experiment that even prompted me to say hi to Christina in the first place. I tried to offer her a little compliment, and I was the one who walked away feeling blessed.

Funny--and amazing--how setting our minds on Christ and encouraging others does our hearts a world of good. And how about you? What's your story on this week's assignment?

Phillippians 4:8-9, The Message

Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

The Experiment!

Thursday evening was such a blessing to me personally. What a joy to spend time with all of you! Let's remember this weeks' experiment. Try and pass out as many compliments and words of encouragement that you possibly can! Also, remember the homework assignments and the journaling. May God lead us on this journey as we help one another to be transformed into the image of God! Let's be ready to report back on Thursday night as we see what God is doing.

A quote on loving your sister

Join us tonight as Pastor Carla teaches on loving your sisters. To get us thinking about it, and the wonder of God's image displayed and reflected through each of his 'ezers, here's a quote from the late author and apologist CS Lewis:

"It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations . . . You have never talked to a mere mortal . . . Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses."

As promised...

Here are the (correct) answer keys for lessons 1 and 2. Once again, so very sorry for the ridiculous state of the answer key in the book - entirely my fault! But this should get us all on the same page.

Lesson 1: who you are, liberating, God's image, rule, subdue, vice regents, God, others, cast the mold, Eve, life-giver, 'ezer, helper, battle, solitude, community.

Lesson 2: Church, men, women, beautiful relationship, Christ, the Church, world, men, women, very best, noble character, assertive, talents, abilities, respect, love, respecting, servant, servant leader, union, profound mystery, half, half, full, single, married, motherhood, obedience, community, sexual, equal, feminine, choice, circumstance, honest, desires, actively, accountable.

Can't wait to see you all there tomorrow night!

Quote from Carolyn Custis James

Hi ladies: In anticipation of our lesson on The Blessed Alliance between men and women, here's a quote from an author who has taught me multitudes about what it means to be an ezer.

"We've made marriage and motherhood the be-all and end-all, but being a wife and mother isn't God's highest calling," she said. Marriage and motherhood is a divine calling, but to be God's image-bearer is our highest calling."

-Carolyn Custis James, interviewed in The Grand Rapids Press